Please Harder, Professor

Chapter 176

Sophie’s POV

Bellamy’s words hit me like ice water. I stared at him, anger and something else, something I didn't want to name, warring in my chest.

"How dare you," I said, my voice shaking. "You have no right…"

"You waited too long for him to get his shit together," Bellamy continued, not backing down even as I glared at him. "You went through circles of hell before he bothered to propose. And even then, the proposal itself was far-fetched."

"We’re not having this conversation." My voice came out weaker than I wanted.

"You deserve someone who wanted to marry you from the beginning," he pressed on, leaning closer across the center console. "Not someone who needed to hit rock bottom before he could step up and be a decent human being."

"Adrian was scared!" I shot back, finding my anger again. "He was terrified of becoming his father, of not being good enough. People deserve second chances, Bellamy. He's trying. He's actually trying to change."

"How many chances does one man get?"

Bellamy's voice was sharp now, cutting.

"How many times do you forgive abandonment? Emotional absence? Lies about his shadow business dealings? At what point do you stop making excuses for him and admit that maybe, just maybe, he's showing you exactly who he is?"

"You don't know everything about our relationship," I snapped.

"I know enough." Bellamy’s eyes were hard, unrelenting. "You’re just too afraid to admit that after everything you’ve been through, Adrian might be the wrong choice."

The words cut deep because they were partially true.

"This isn't your business!" I yelled, my hands clenched into fists. "You have no right to question my choices. No right to stand there and judge my relationship when you don't understand what we've been through together."

"You're right," Bellamy said, his voice dropping to something quieter but no less intense. "I don't have that right. But someone should be asking you these questions, Sophie. And everyone else is too polite or too invested in the fairy tale ending to do it."

"Fairy tale ending?" I laughed bitterly. "You think any of this is a fairy tale? My life has been a nightmare for the past year!"

"Exactly," he said. "So why are you signing up for more of it? Why are you marrying the man who caused most of that nightmare?"

"Because I love him!" The words burst out of me, desperate and angry. "I love Adrian. Despite everything, despite all the shit we've been through, I love him. Why is that so hard for you to understand?"

"Because you deserve better than someone you have to make excuses for!" Bellamy's voice rose to match mine. "You deserve better than a man who keeps secrets and lies and disappears when things get hard!"

"And what, you think you're better?" I challenged, fury coursing through me. "You think you know what's best for me? This is jealousy, Bellamy. Pure jealousy. You're trying to sabotage my happiness because you can't have what Adrian has."

"This has nothing to do with jealousy," he said through gritted teeth.

"Doesn't it?" I pushed. "You admitted you have feelings for me. You kissed me. And now you're sitting here trying to convince me not to marry my fiancé. How is that not jealousy?"

Bellamy's jaw clenched. "You're blindfolded, Sophie. Too naive to see what's right in front of you. Adrian doesn't deserve you. Hell, I'm not even sure he's good enough to have knocked you up in the first place."

The words hung in the air for one stunned second.

Then my hand moved before I could think about it. The slap connected with his cheek with a sharp crack that echoed in the confined space of the car.

Bellamy's head snapped to the side. A red mark immediately bloomed on his face where my hand had struck. He touched his cheek, then looked at me with something like shock mixed with grim acceptance.

"Take me home," I said, my voice deadly calm despite the fury shaking through me. "Right now."

"Sophie…"

"I said take me home." I turned away from him, checking on Amelia in the backseat. My daughter was still playing happily with her toy, oblivious to the explosion that had just happened in the front seat. "And after you drop us off, I don't want to see you again."

There was a deliberate pause before Bellamy finally started the car without another word. The drive back to the apartment was silent except for Amelia's occasional babbles and the sound of traffic around us.

I kept my face turned to the window, refusing to look at him, my hand still stinging from the impact.

When he pulled up to the apartment building, I didn't wait for him to come around and open my door. I got out immediately, unbuckled Amelia from her car seat, and gathered her into my arms along with the diaper bag.

"Sophie, wait." Bellamy started, but I slammed the car door and walked toward the building without looking back.

I heard him say something else, but I was already gone, carrying Amelia through the lobby and into the elevator. My hands were shaking so badly I could barely press the button for our floor.

The apartment was quiet when I let myself in. Adrian was still at work, wouldn't be home for hours. I set Amelia down in her playpen with some toys, then collapsed onto the couch, my whole body trembling with rage and something else I didn't want to examine.

Bellamy's words circled in my head like vultures.

You waited too long. The proposal was about obligation, not desire. You deserve someone who wanted to marry you from the beginning.

I watched you thrive without him. And then he came back with a ring and suddenly all that strength disappeared.

You're blindfolded. Too naive to see what's right in front of you.

I pressed my hands to my face, trying to block out the thoughts, but they kept coming.

Was I marrying Adrian because I truly wanted to? Or because I'd already invested so much—my reputation, my body, my entire life—that walking away felt impossible?

Was I confusing love with obligation? Security with happiness? The familiar with the right choice?

And the worst question of all, the one I'd been avoiding since that night on the balcony: Did I have feelings for Bellamy that went beyond gratitude?

"Stop it," I whispered to myself. "Just stop."

But the doubts were there now, planted deep. And I didn't know how to dig them out.

I looked down at the engagement ring on my finger—beautiful, expensive, Adrian's claim on me made visible. I twisted it around and around, watching the diamond catch the light.

Soon, I'd be walking down an aisle in that perfect dress Eleanor had helped me choose. I'd be saying vows in front of family and friends. I'd be binding myself to Adrian permanently, legally, in front of everyone.

The thought should have filled me with joy. With excitement.

Instead, all I felt was a creeping sense of dread I couldn't shake.

My phone buzzed. A text from Adrian: Meeting running late. Won't be home until after 9.

I stared at the message. Thought about Bellamy's accusations. About secrets and lies and shadow business dealings.

What was Adrian really doing? Was he in a meeting, or was he handling something else? Something he wouldn't tell me about until it was too late?

I didn't respond to his text. Just set the phone down and pulled Amelia from her playpen into my arms, holding my daughter close while doubts I couldn't ignore circled endlessly through my mind.