radicalducati Book 3: Laila
Book 3: Laila
Cedric didn’t relax the entire night. Even when I went to bed, I could hear him pacing the floor beneath me. He called Ryker and made sure the pack knows that there’s something strange going on. A rogue wolf’s scent doesn’t just appear out of nowhere and then disappear without a trace. I don’t like that there are rogue wolfs sniffing around our pack. Cedric used to be considered a rogue after his pack disbanded, but many rogues choose the solidarity for nefarious reasons. Not all rogues are bad, but the majority are.
Dressed in his park ranger uniform, Cedric grabs his keys off the kitchen counter. He’s still tense and on alert, but it seems like there’s something else on his mind, only I can’t pinpoint it. “I’ll be fine,” I assure him. “Micah’s outside with the girls, and I’ll be with my dad for the rest of the day.”
His eyes flash to that of his wolf, but it’s only for a second. Mine have never glowed before like that. Cedric looks at me and sighs. “I know you’ll be fine. Hell, you had me flat on my back yesterday. I have no doubt you can take care of yourself.” He rubs a hand over his chest. “There’s just this feeling I can’t shake.”
I feel it too. It’s that weird, sickening vibe I felt last night. It lingers all around us like an impending doom is about to happen. Walking over to him, I wrap my arms around his waist and lay my head on his chest. “Be careful today.”
He rubs his hands up and down my back. When he touches me, it’s as if everything disappears, and it’s just us. “Same to you. And good luck with your designs. I know your dad’s client will love them.”
“I hope so,” I whisper.
“I’ll be back over here after work. Call me if you need me.”
“I will.” I step back, and he kisses me before hurrying out the door. He says a few words to Micah and then gets in his truck and drives off. Time is passing by quickly. The full moon will be here in a couple of weeks, and I have to decide what to do. Do I seal the bond with Cedric or wait? It doesn’t matter if we wait for this full moon or the one six months from now. The outcome will be the same. Only I have no idea what that will be. Will I be more shifter or fae? Will I stay the same and still have my magic? A part of me wants to see what the Land of the Fae is like, but I don’t want to risk the chance of not being able to come back. The rules are different in the fae realm. Their words hold power, not like the language here where promises can be just empty words.
Beck’s vow to me comes to mind. I rush upstairs to my room and grab my mother’s journals out of my dresser. I sit on my bed and skim through the notes my dad and I made. It doesn’t take long to find my mother’s knowledge on vows. Her handwriting is otherworldly, very fae-like, and magical. One day, I’ll be able to read the language myself, but I have to rely on my father’s translation for now.
Her words say: Vows naa sacred a' i' fae. Iire i' words naa spoken, i' vow can ere' be rusva e' er en' atta ways, either ed' fulfillment ri' invokien i' tenkela rusv- ta. Ere' i' person i' vow naa thrust deno' can rusva ta freely. Ilya tanya er must uma naa say i' words, amin leitha lle en' sina debt. Once i' words naa spoken, i' vow naa considered fulfilled.
Translation: Vows are sacred to the fae. When the words are spoken, the vow can only be broken in one of two ways, either by fulfillment or invoking the spell to break it. Only the person the vow is thrust upon can break it freely. All that one must do is say the words ... I free you of this debt. Once the words are spoken, the vow is considered fulfilled.
“If you have a question, you can just ask me,” Beck calls out.
The breath hitches in my lungs, and I jerk around, my heart beating wildly in my chest. “Dammit, Beck. You scared the hell out of me.”
Arms crossed over his chest and dressed like a fae warrior with his sword strapped to his waist, he smiles. “I can tell. Your heart’s beating out of control.” His smile slowly fades as he walks around the bed to stand before me. “It’s nice hearing you say my name. I’ve been waiting for you to say it.”
There’s a longing in his voice, and it hurts my heart. “I’m sorry,” I say softly. And I am. I’m intrigued by who he is, and I want to know more about the fae and where I come from, but my heart isn’t with him.
Beck kneels in front of me and places a hand over mine. A soft, white light glows from our hands, signaling the bond between us. According to my mom’s journal, it’s what happens when one is vowed to another. Once the vow is complete, there is no light. It’s a sign that the vow has been fulfilled.
Beck’s icy blue eyes bore into mine. There’s a sadness in them I haven’t seen before. “Usually I go after what I want, but with you, I waited for you to decide. I’m starting to think it was a bad move on my part.”
“What do you mean?”
He averts his gaze to our luminous hands. “You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”
Just hearing those words out loud feels right. I haven’t known Cedric long, but in my heart, I know I love him. It’s like I’ve always loved him, even before I knew who he was.
“I do,” I murmur. “And I can’t leave him. I know you vowed to protect me, but this is where I belong.” I slide my hand away from his and reach for my mother’s journal. “That’s why I was trying to figure out how to break the vow. It’s not fair to you.” All I have to do is say the words. “Amin leitha …”
Beck’s eyes widen. “Stop!” He covers my mouth with his hand. “Don’t say it.” I hold up my hands, and he slowly lets me go. “Please don’t say the words. Not yet.”
“Why don’t you want to be free from me?”
He sighs. “I’ve been connected to you for years, Laila. I don’t know, maybe I’m not ready to let you go. What I do know is that Dorian is still out there. Until he’s defeated, I don’t think it’s wise to break the vow, not when I can protect you. All you have to do is say my name, and I’ll know where to find you.”
“Okay,” I murmur. “But when the time comes, I’m saying the words.”
He gets to his feet and steps back slowly. “You can still come with me, Laila. You’ll be safer in the Land of the Fae.”
“But I won’t be happy. I can’t hurt Cedric like that.”
The air shimmers behind him. “I understand. Be safe, Laila. I’m always around if you need me.” He steps through the portal and disappears.
“I, for one, am glad the faerie wolf triangle didn’t come into fruition,” Amelie says, her voice just outside the door.
Pursing my lips, I watch her walk in. “Nosy much?”
She giggles and throws up her arms. “Hey, I was getting worried. Beck is seriously good looking. You should hear Faith talk about him.” Her smile fades a little as she sits on my bed. “And I know you have a lot of fae in you. The allure of a faerie prince is kind of enticing.”
The idea of it is, but my heart never strayed on me. I’ve always known what I wanted. “Cedric has nothing to worry about,” I say in all honesty.
Amelie breathes a sigh of relief. “Good. Anyone can see that he truly loves you.”
I pat her hand. “I’m starting to think I love him too.”
“Laila, you ready to go?” Micah hollers from downstairs. “Faith and I are going to drop you off at your dad’s.”
Amelie nods toward the door. “Good luck today. I have no doubt you’ll get the job. Your designs are gorgeous.”
“Thanks.” I grab my notebook off the dresser that has all of my designs in it.
“Is Cedric staying with us tonight?” she asks as I head for the door.
I stop and glance at her over my shoulder with a smile on my face. “Don’t know. I think we might need some privacy. I know it’s killing him not getting close to me.”
Amelie shakes her head and laughs. “Oh, I know. The guy is stronger than I realized. I’m just glad he’s respectful of you. You deserve it.” She stands and walks over to me. “Does he know you’ve never been with a man before?”
It’s a subject we haven’t talked about, at least not on my part. I already know he’s been around the block a few times with several local human women, which I try not to think about.
“No,” I answer. “I’m sure it’ll come up soon.”
“Laila!” Faith shouts. “You’re going to be late.”
I wink at Amelie. “See you soon.”
I rush downstairs, and both Micah and Faith are in his car, ready to go. One of these days, when the dark fae is not hunting me, I’ll be able to do things on my own again. Right now, I want to do everything I can to keep my family and friends safe, even if I have to give up some of my freedom.
Since my dad lives away from the pack, it takes a few minutes to get to his place. When we arrive, he’s waiting outside by his car, dressed in a suit, looking all regal with his whitish-blond hair perfectly coifed. He reminds me so much of my uncle Sebastian in the way they dress. Micah, on the other hand, is more loveable and down to earth. He’s not the suit-wearing type. Still, you can tell they’re all brothers—my family.
My dad walks over to help me out of Micah’s car and smiles. “You look beautiful, Laila.” I didn’t know what to wear to the meeting, so I chose a pair of black dress pants and a blue, silky button-down top. His gaze averts to my notebook. “Is that your drawings?”
I nod. “Take a look.” I hand him the notebook and wave at Micah and Faith as they back out of the driveway.
My dad flips through all of the drawings, and seeing the pride in his bright blue eyes makes my heart soar. “Impressive. Richard will love them.”
My stomach flips with excitement. “Glad you think so.”
He opens the passenger’s side door for me. “Just so you know, Richard thinks you’re my sister. With us looking the same age, I can’t exactly tell him you’re my daughter.”
“I understand,” I say as I get in the car. It’s one of the many lies we have to tell humans.
Once on our way, I start to get nervous. I don’t want to let my dad down if Richard hates my ideas. It’s his name on the line. “How did you get to be so good at designing houses?” I ask.
My father glances over at me and smiles. “I learned the art from your grandfather. That man was gifted in many ways.”
“Do you miss your parents?” I know they were killed when the Royal pack was ambushed many years ago.
“Every day,” he confesses. “They would’ve loved you.”
Hearing about their senseless murder is another reason why I’ve hated being a shifter. All the killing for sport, for the chance to be the most substantial pack. What’s the point? Everyone wants to be the alpha. I’ve never understood that desire. Maybe that’s why Cedric and I were chosen for each other. He’s an alpha in his own right, but he decided to step aside so Ryker could lead the Teton pack. That’s not something you often see in the shifter world. It makes me respect Cedric more.
My father clears his throat, his expression a little uncomfortable. The more time we spend together, the more he opens up to me, even though he’s still reserved when it comes to the rest of the people in the pack. “How are things with you and Cedric?”
Hearing his name brings a smile to my face. “Good. We picked out Christmas trees last night after he got off of work.”
“Speaking of work, I hear you’re going to be a park ranger one day.”
“I am,” I say with pride. “I’m going to be shadowing Cedric. Then, when I’m not doing that, I’ll work on designing with you. That is if I have any clients.”
His lips pull back. “You don’t need me to get clients, Laila. You can do that all on your own. All I want is for you to be happy.”
“I am,” I assure him.
“So there’s no chance you’re going to up and leave with the fae prince?” he asks, his voice tense.
“No,” I reply. The second I say it, his shoulders relax, and I smile. “I’m going to stay here with you and everyone else I love. I just hope the dark fae don’t find me before it’s time to complete the bond.”
His eyes widen, and he jerks his attention to me. “At the next full moon?”
I shrug. “I’m in love with him. He’s everything I could ever want in a mate.”
“What about your magic? What if you lose it?”
I shake my head. “I won’t. It’s a part of me. I have to believe it’ll still be who I am.” My magic is a part of my soul. If I mate with Cedric, it’ll only make me stronger. There’s no way I could lose my magic, no matter what others might believe.
We turn down a long, paved road, and at the end of it is a vast mountain house that has to be over a million dollars. This is just one of Richard Tanner’s homes and not one that my dad built for him. That one is currently being designed. For now, Richard wants to see what I can do for his current house.
My dad shuts off the car and grabs my wrist before I reach for the door. “What if you still have your magic after the full moon? Dorian will still be able to find you.”
I place a hand over the black carmine rock in my pocket. It’s the only thing keeping me hidden. “What would you have me do?” I ask in all honesty. When all of this started, my first thought was to run away to keep everyone safe, but after being with the Teton pack, I feel stronger. I don’t want to run away.
His stormy blue eyes stare straight into mine. “You’re a Lyall, Laila. I think you know what you want to do.” He squeezes my wrist. “And I’ll be right there to help you. No one’s going to take you away from me.”
I want to protect my family and friends. If Dorian comes for me, I’ll be ready for him myself. “Like father, like daughter.”
He nods. “Exactly. Now come on and let’s show Richard what you can do.”
* * *
By the time we’re done at Richard’s house, I’m on air. He loved my designs and wants me to start decorating his home immediately. In the beginning, all I had to go on were pictures, but now that I’ve seen the house in person, there’s so much I can do. I don’t even know where to begin. The good thing is that he’s leaving to head back to New York for a few weeks, and I’ll have free rein over his house.
“That went well,” my dad says as we turn out of the driveway onto the road.
I slide Richard’s credit card into my wallet. “I can’t believe he gave me his card.” With all the things I need to buy, it’ll be around two hundred thousand dollars. Richard didn’t bat an eyelash when I mentioned the numbers.
My father laughs. “Richard’s an important man in New York. He has more money than us, and the Lyall’s have been around for hundreds of years.”
As lovely as it would be to have that much money, it doesn’t make people happy. That’s why I never cared about spending the money I got from the Sierra pack, other than to pay for the black carmine to protect me. At least I can say some of it was spent for good.
My phone beeps with an incoming text.
Cedric: How did it go?
Grinning, I text him back.
Me: Great. Are you off of work yet?
Cedric: On my way to your house.
Actually, I have something else in mind.
Me: Change of plans. I’m on my way to yours. Meet me there.
Cedric: I’ll be there in five.
I slide my phone back into my purse. “Think you can drop me off at Cedric’s?”
The corner of my dad’s mouth lifts slightly. “I can.” Then he looks over at me. “He’s a good man, Laila. I’m glad you found your mate. Things in this world happen for a reason.”
“Exactly,” I agree. “You may miss my mother, but there’s someone else out there for you.”
His gaze hardens, and he looks away. “That’s the last thing on my mind right now.” I’ve never been in love with someone and lost them the way he has. I know the pain has to be unbearable. I haven’t been with Cedric long, but I can’t even stomach the concept of not having him in my life.
We pull up to Cedric’s house, and he’s already there, waiting for me on his porch, still dressed in his uniform. I love the way he looks in it. He nods at my dad, and my dad does the same back at him.
When he turns to me, I look into his bright blue eyes and smile. “I love you.”
He smiles back, but it’s sad. “I love you too. And I’m happy for you and Cedric. I know he’ll take care of you.”
Cedric walks over to my side and opens the door. “I have no doubt,” I murmur.
I get out of the car and wave at my dad as he leaves. Cedric takes my hand and kisses it as we walk up the front porch stairs. “What’s going on? Why the change of plans?”
“I thought we could use some alone time.”
His eyes flash, and he turns his head quickly, but not fast enough. The need in him is strong, and I know it’s taken a lot for him to keep his control around me. He opens the door for me and walks in behind me. “Let me get changed, and then we can eat some dinner. Seraphina called and said she dropped off some food for us and put it in the refrigerator.”
This time, I keep my head turned from him so he can’t see my smile. “Sounds good.”
He disappears down the hall to his bedroom, and I take a deep breath. It’s time we take the next step. I’m both excited and terrified all at the same time. Most women my age have been with several men, but I don’t have that kind of experience. I don’t even know if Cedric realizes that I’m a virgin. It’s something I haven’t exactly told him.
Slowly, I tiptoe down the hall. The bedroom door is cracked, and Cedric is inside with nothing but a pair of boxers on as he reaches for a T-shirt out of his dresser. I gently push the door open, and he glances at me over his shoulder. The tension between us ignites, and I can feel the heat all through my body.
“Laila,” he murmurs, his voice a deep growl. “What are you doing?”
I walk in and shut the door behind me. “I think it’s time we take the next step, don’t you think?”
His eyes flash, and he closes them. “My control can only get me so far. You have to be sure about this.”
While his eyes are still closed, I step toward him, unbuttoning my shirt one button at a time. When they’re all undone, I toss my shirt onto the floor. He opens his eyes and stares down at it before turning his heated gaze to my body. I slide my hands up his arms and then clasp them around his neck.
“I want this, Cedric. I want you.” His arms circle my waist, pulling me into his body. I can feel his arousal pressing against my stomach, and it makes me tremble with anticipation. “Just be gentle with me,” I whisper. “I’ve never …”
His lips close over mine, his kiss cutting off my words. “Don’t worry,” he murmurs. “I won’t hurt you. You’re safe with me.”
Lifting me in his arms, he carefully lays me on his bed. He kisses his way down my neck to my breasts, sliding the fabric away so he can glide his tongue across my nipple. Everything in me tightens, and I groan. I want more. He massages my other breast and works his lips over the other.
“That feels so good.”
Cedric chuckles. “Just wait. It gets better.” He unbuttons my pants and slides them down my legs along with my underwear. Spreading me wide, he licks his lips and lowers his head to between my legs. My clit throbs, even more so when his tongue flicks across it, making me gasp.
In one slow, delectable movement, he slides his fingers inside of me and closes his lips over my clit, sucking and licking. I feel like I’m going to go insane. My whole body is on fire, desperate for release. “Fuck, you’re so wet,” he groans. “I can feel you getting tighter.”
Removing his fingers, he replaces them with his warm tongue and enters me, thrusting and rubbing my clit with his nose. The friction is mind-blowing, and along with his tongue, I’m about to lose control, especially when he grips the inside of my thigh and growls. He knows I’m close.
“I want you to come, baby. Let me taste you.”
In just a matter of seconds, my body explodes, and I scream out his name, rocking my hips until the last remnants of my orgasm subside. Breathing hard, I lay there, completely and utterly ready for more. I want him more than I’ve wanted anything else in the world.
He climbs up my body, and I cup his face. “Take my blood, Cedric. It’s time you really taste me.”
When his gray eyes glow, they’re mesmerizing. “You sure?”
I nod. “Yes. And I want to taste you.”
His fangs grow, and he nips his bottom lip, drawing blood. When it comes to mates, the sharing of blood is sacred. It links the two together in mind, body, and soul. I’ll be able to hear his thoughts and he with mine. We’ll also be able to see visions of our future. It’s one of the perks of blood sharing. You get a glimpse into what your life has in store for you. I’m ready to see what our future holds.
“What do you think we’ll see?” he asks, his gaze uncertain.
“I don’t know, but I think it’s time we find out.”
Ever so slowly, his lips connect with mine, and I taste his blood. It’s like everything opens up in my mind. Before, I could sense his desire for me, but now I can feel it and hear what he’s thinking. Cedric nips my lip with his fangs, drawing out my own blood. As soon as he tastes it, I’m thrust out of my own body and into a vision … only it’s not what I expect.
I look around, and Cedric is nowhere to be seen. It’s dark, but the moon is bright in the sky, making the snow shimmer. “Cedric?” I call out.
Nothing.
I look up at the stars, and there are magical, shimmery strings floating in the air. I know what they are. It’s the strings that bind two wolves together when they mate. They are supposed to connect, but ours are not. They swirl all around me, untethered like lost souls. A lonely, cold feeling settles into the pit of my stomach. It reminds me of what death feels like.
“Cedric!” I scream.
I gasp the second I’m thrust out of the vision. Cedric jumps to his feet, his body covered in sweat. The anger pours off of him in droves as he paces the floor like a caged animal. He wasn’t in my vision, but I know he saw the same thing because I can see it in his mind. I don’t know what it means, but I know it’s not good.
My heart beats so fast it makes me sick. I slide to the edge of the bed, wishing like hell I could get the vision out of my mind. Now that Cedric and I shared blood, I can hear his thoughts. They’re all jumbled together, but I can clearly pick out some of the words.
Does she leave me?
Something’s wrong.
Death.
I couldn’t protect her.
I reach out to touch him, but he charges through the house and bursts through the front door. “Cedric, stop!” I yell. The pain and disappointment he feels is so deep I can’t penetrate through it.
By the time I get the words out, he already shifted and taking off for the woods. “Cedric, please come back,” I say through the bond. One second, we’re connected, and in the next, he shuts himself off from me.
I rush back to the bedroom to put on my clothes. He doesn’t go far because I can sense him near, pacing along the property line. The confusion in him is so intense he can’t hide it all from me. I want to run out to him, but instead, I sit on the front porch.
He needs time to think, and so do I. Whatever we saw is not going to be our future. I won’t let it.