In the Captivity of Temptation

38 Painful moments of awakening

I open my eyes and squint from the glaring white light. Pressure builds in my chest. My mouth is a desert. It is dry and I am very thirsty. My head feels as heavy as granite.

Oh God, where am I?

At first, I couldn't understand. I strain my brain. I force myself to remember. And then again, that beloved face. That crazy eye contact... and the moment when both of us are blown away by an explosion.

I cry again. Tears flood my face, and sobs burst from my throat. A dull moan sounds from my chest. A sharp pain floods my entire being, cutting into my consciousness and drowning it.

Suddenly, someone appears nearby because I hear a soft, soothing whisper.

" Quiet, quiet. It's all right. You weren't hurt. Everything is fine.

I want to argue that nothing is fine, damn it. Then I force myself to ask what troubles me the most. I bite my lips to hold back more sobs and force myself to speak. My tongue is wooden but still manages to hoarsely whisper:

" There was a man...

" Yes, dear.”

" What’s with him?"

I'm afraid to actually ask if he is... if he is…

" Alive," the medic responds, and I start sobbing with relief.

" Thank God, " I exhale…

" It's all right, dear. Now relax. You need to rest.

" What’s with him? " I stare insistently into the woman's kind face because I need to know. Desperately need to know that he is unharmed.

I scan her friendly face and notice a slight furrow cutting across her forehead. The woman seems thoughtful. I've seen that expression hundreds of times in my challenging work. That's how people think of how to deliver not-so-pleasant news softly. To tell a half-truth…

" Tell me the truth, " I ask as firmly as I can.

She sighs.

" He is alive. Physical injuries are minor. But...

"But??"

" He hasn't regained consciousness yet."

"What does that mean? Isn't that normal?” " Chaotic thoughts attack my brain. "How long is it typically normal to be unconscious?"

" When were we brought in? " I suddenly ask.

" Last evening, " the woman replies, and I read in her eyes: "By this time, he should have regained consciousness."

Oh God, and he was so close…

" I want to see him, " I whisper.

" You can't get out of bed yet, " she shakes her head in disagreement. " But don't worry. His fiancée is with him.

His... who?

I swallow nervously and begin to hate this bitch even more, with every fiber of my soul. Anger rises in waves in my chest, from the fact that she is with him right now, and I can't be... Can't get up, can't touch... and see for myself that he's all right.

" When can I see him?

" Not today, dear, " the woman says softly and looks away.

I follow her gaze. There's a catheter in my hand, and a long plastic tube leading from it. I trace it with my eyes. An IV drip.

" And now sleep, dear. Rest up.

I want to argue, but my eyelids are so heavy. And in a moment, I fall back into darkness.

Andriy

I slowly regain consciousness. It's still hard to open my eyes. My eyelids are damn heavy, as is my entire body. I try to move my arms and legs, but they don't listen. Then, a familiar scent hits my nostrils. Extremely familiar.

Bi???

I try to remember what happened. But my memory stubbornly blocks the memories with a dense curtain. Finally, I hear a whisper and sobs, "Endrus, dear... Please, come to your senses."

I force myself to open my eyes. My eyelids are like lead. Dim light still cuts into my eyes. I squint. Blink. And I get angry. Yes. Angry. Because I can't move, and it's hard even to turn my head. But for some reason, her sobs annoy me the most.

But why? It's Bi.

I give myself time. Inhale-exhale. Calm down.

"Pull yourself together," I growl to myself internally. Think! Remember! Why am I here? And where am I, by the way?"

I squint from the effort to look to the side. My gaze hits a tearful Bianca. Then she catches my look and begins to cry harder. I'm irritated. I can't stand it when she cries.

" Bi, " I rasp. " Stop it.

She touches my face with her cold fingers. I just wince. Bi pulls her hands back.

" It hurts. Sorry, dear, I'll be right back," she quickly gets up and runs out of the room.

“Dear, dear..." " I roll these words in my mind. "Why do they seem so alien and strange? After all, it's Bi..."

Again, I'm irritated.

I scan the room. This makes my eyes hurt and my head spin. I take a deep breath.

It looks like a hospital ward.

I try to look at myself, but I only see some wires and tubes attached to my arms.

Intense analysis of facts makes my head, which already felt leaden, feel like a lump of stone, and a hot, burning pain mercilessly pulses in my temples. Again Bi's voice comes, but it's harder to open my eyes now. I hear another voice.

Friend. Brother. Lukash.

I pry my eyelids open. I look at two people dear to me, and memories slowly start to roll in. Like waves. I close my eyelids. My temples are splitting with pain. I want to rub them with my fingers, but they don't obey my brain.

" Mr. Andriy, wonderful that you've come round, " a strange voice says, and I can no longer control it. I plunge into darkness.

The last thing my tired brain makes out is the face of a pretty blonde and her captivating gaze. But whether it's a memory or a fantasy, I'm no longer able to discern.

When I wake up again, " my head is not so heavy. I listen. I lie with my eyes closed. Trying to remember what happened.

Here we are having dinner with Lukash. I don't recall what the conversation was about, but I distinctly remember my emotions. Why was I so angry? Almost enraged?

"Remember! Think!" " I angrily growl to myself internally. "What happened? What?" " The solution is so close.

Then, before my inner eye, the face of the pretty blonde appears again.

"Who is she?" " spins in my tired consciousness. I can't get away from the thought that I definitely know who she is.

" Andriy, " a soft whisper sounds, and I pry my eyes open.

" Bi, "I rasp.

Brown eyes look at me with adoration, and I don't understand why my chest feels empty. Nothing tugs at me, as if this is not the Bi I know.

" It's all right, dear. Everything will be fine now, " she whispers happily.

I emotionlessly watch as she kisses my palm, then Lukash comes in.

And I remember... Everything to the last frame.

“Milana," it catches in my chest, and I catastrophically lack air. "My baby was too close."

Panic starts to squeeze my chest like a vice.

"Where is she? What happened to her?" " pounds in my temples.

" Please leave the room, " a stern male voice says. " The patient's pulse is off the charts.

My eyes stop at a thin man of age.

"Tiny" flickers in my mind, but he quite adeptly ushers everyone out the door.

I watch from the corner of my eye as Lukash and Bianca leave, and the doctor approaches and fiddles with the IV drip that I noticed earlier.

" What about the girl? " I rasp.

" Relax, " he doesn't respond, then seems to relent under my firm gaze. " All right. She came around. Suffered a light concussion and scratches.

I exhale. There's a lightness in my chest. But I need to ensure her safety.

"Don't tell anyone, " I hissed.

"What exactly?" He looks attentively.

"That I asked about her, " I say firmly.

I understand that I need his help.

"Can I trust you, doctor? " I ask directly, dismissing all precautions, as there really isn't a choice.

Time is short. Best friends outside the door. And Milana somewhere else. In a completely different room. Alone.

I need to act quickly.