radicalducati 21
21
Alex’s POV
After splashing my face with ice cold water for like ten times, I finally calmed down.
I mean I kind of knew what I signed up for when I asked for her specifically, but I didn’t think she would get that much under my skin.
And it was only the first fucking day.
I still didn’t get my answer about Jacob.
I have to make sure if she’s going to say anything later on or continue to keep her mouth shut, so I can have Jacob come back to town again.
I’ll give it a few more days, then get my answer out of her, no matter what it takes.
I get out of the bathroom, and I instantly see her flinch a little.
She was still sitting in the same spot.
She was back to being scared again. She was clenching her hands tightly in her lap and her gaze was shifting between the bed and the floor.
What is it now?
I checked the table and saw the water bottle half drained. At least she accepted the painkillers I gave her.
I stood there just outside the bathroom, looking down at her, trying to figure out what’s going on through her head.
Did she regret her words to me and thought I was going to hurt her now?
Whatever it was that got her scared, I wanted it to last.
Because as long as she remains afraid, she will keep her retorts to herself and keep me sane.
She finally gathers her courage and looks up at me.
“Where am I going to sleep?” she asks in a small voice.
I answer simply “On the bed”
Her eyes narrow “And you?”
Aha, now it all makes sense.
I cover my amusement and continue in the same simple tone “On the bed”
Her mouth opens a little and she asks “On the same bed?”
I tilted my head a little and said sarcastically “I don’t see any other bed here”
If I wasn’t so pissed at her already, her expression would force a laugh to come out of me right now.
She was horrified by the idea of sleeping next to me.
I was a hundred percent sure right then that she was never touched by anyone before.
Now her scared state makes sense. She was afraid I was going to do something to her, sexually.
The idea amused and disgusted me at the same time.
She really thought I was capable of anything.
As much as I wanted to put her out of her misery and assure her that no matter what happens between us, I would never ever stoop to such levels to break her, I thought better of it and decided to let that possibility in her head.
Maybe that will force her to think twice before crossing me.
I don’t care what she fucking thinks of me, as long as I know myself, I don’t have to explain who I really am to her.
She was still staring at me with the same horrified expression, her nervousness threatening to overwhelm her.
I speak coldly “I wanted you to stay in the same room to keep an eye on you, and seeing that there are no other beds here, we are going to have to share this bed from now on. I take the right side, you take the left one. We put a large pillow between us and stick to our sides”
“Can’t we get a large sofa instead of these two chairs?” she asks with a hopeful tone.
I answer curtly “No, because I like my room just the way it is. If you have a problem with the sleeping arrangement…. I suggest you deal with it”
And with that, I turn and walk towards the door to my room and lock it with the key I retrieved from my nightstand when I grabbed the medicine.
I close the lights, and go to my side of the bed.
I put the longest pillow in the middle of the bed to act as the divider between both sides, and lay on my back, with my eyes fixed on her.
She can’t see me at all from her side of the room.
She can’t see if I’m asleep or awake, if I’m staring at her or not.
After I closed all the lights, the room was half lit dimly from the front yard lights coming through the windows, but they only reach half the room. The bed was bathed in darkness, obscuring her view of me, but luckily revealing my view of her.
She remained in the same spot on the chair, trying to look at me, unsuccessfully.
I notice the curtain was swaying a little with the cold wind coming from the half opened window behind her.
I speak quietly and despite that, she jumps in her place a little when she hears my voice “Close the window during sleep time, I like the room warm”
It takes her a few seconds before she complies.
She practically hops on the window ledge to reach it, and I have to fight a smile from appearing on my lips. She’s so damn short for her age.
When she settles herself inside the space, she closes the window and shuts the curtains.
To my amusement, she stays there. She adjusts the pillows under and behind her, puts on her headphones, covers herself with the light blanket and starts watching something on her phone.
So that’s your idea of dealing with it? You’re going to sleep on the ledge?
Damn her stubbornness.
Fine! Suit yourself.
Let’s see how long your back and behind can handle that sleeping position.
I stay watching her for a long time after that, as sleep was nowhere near.
I don’t move from my position at all the entire time. She sneaks looks in my direction every once in a while even though she can’t see anything.
Two hours pass before her head tilts to the side as sleep finally claims her.
I shake my head in amusement. It was the same exact state I saw her in the first time. The headphones still attached, the movie still playing on her phone, and her glasses about to fall down the bridge of her nose.
I had to resist the urge to get up and carry her in my arms into the bed.
She would lose her shit, thinking I was going to sexually assault her, and make a scene in the middle of the night.
I toss and turn in bed but sleep wouldn’t come.
I check my phone watch, it’s three in the morning.
Abruptly, Jennifer jerks awake and clutches her upper chest in pain.
She puts her other hand to stifle her voice.
She stands up and goes into the bathroom quietly.
My curiosity is burning to know what’s wrong with her.
I fight the drive to get up and ask her directly.
I remain in my position and wait for her to emerge out of the bathroom.
She eventually gets out and sits on the chair she sat on earlier.
She rests her head on the back of the chair and her fist bangs silently on the arm.
The painkillers I gave her had short term effects to numb her pain. It was clearly more serious than I anticipated.
She spends the next few hours alternating between pacing, sitting, and leaning against the wall, her face contorting in pain the whole time, but she keeps her tears at bay and doesn’t dare to make a sound.
She was suffering silently.
At one point she even comes closer to me, stands up near the nightstand, and I keep my eyes shut, wondering what’s going on through her mind when she looks at me.
I hear her footsteps retreating and I open my eyes again to watch her.
Eventually, she takes another couple of painkillers from the bottle and downs them with water.
She comes to her side of the bed, and I think she will finally give up her stubbornness and sleep on her side, but she ends up taking a pillow and dropping it on the floor in front of the bed.
She takes the light blanket from the window ledge and drops down to sleep on the thick carpet covering the floor in the space between the bed and the chairs.
My view of her disappears as she lays down there and never gets up again.
I grit my teeth in frustration at her bullheadedness.
I close my eyes and finally surrender to sleep.
***
Jenny’s POV
I wake up to the sound of the shower running in the bathroom.
I open my eyes slowly and look around me as a mini heart attack passes through me.
For a minute, I don’t recognize the room I’m in and I panic. I have been opening my eyes to the same familiar surroundings of my room for the past eighteen years. It takes me by surprise when I open them and find a completely different atmosphere.
I calm my rapidly beating heart as I regain my memory and remember that this new room will become my new reality everyday.
I was huddled in a ball on the not so comfortable carpet on the floor, shaking slightly as I begin to feel the deep cold seeping into my bones.
The light blanket I covered myself in at night was too thin to warm me in the very cold room.
I get up to a sitting position and lean my back against the bed’s back frame. I suppress my groan as every bone in my body literally screams in pain.
I wasn’t sure whether the source of those painful feelings were the various bruises on my body, or the fact that I spent the little few hours I managed to catch some sleep in on the hard floor.
Probably both.
My upper chest was a constant dull throbs ever since last night.
It never settled down after the first pills I took from the bottle Alex left for me on the table. They barely made a dent to numb the pain.
I take a few deep breaths, trying to ignore the aches and the pain.
They became a part of me that I was slowly learning to withstand.
I check my watch and find it seven thirty in the morning. I had barely slept for three hours or so.
Surprisingly, I was wide awake and alert despite how tired I should be feeling from yesterday’s unending drama.
It was probably because I had the huge task to convince Alex somehow to let me go visit my mom this morning. I was willing to do whatever it takes to get his permission, beg even.
It was the last time I would probably ever see my mom again. I had to have that final meeting with her before she leaves this town forever.
She is supposed to leave with Megan after midnight of this day.
Her flight was scheduled tomorrow at five in the morning.
Today was my only and final chance to say goodbye to her, to smell her, hug her, kiss her, and look at her face, for one last time… most probably.
That realization brought a lump to my throat that threatened to travel to my eyes and make them teary, but I pushed it down right away.
I had to focus on getting permission and keep the desperation and any indicator of my sadness in check in front of everyone.
No one, and I mean no one can know about this plan until it was over.
I needed to keep my emotions at bay throughout this whole day, just until the next morning comes.
After that, it won’t matter.
I jump a little and my train of thought gets interrupted when Alex opens the bathroom door and steps out.
I snap my head to him and freeze there.
Damn!
My thoughts about his abs from yesterday’s analysis at the church proved to be correct.
He was standing in front of me in a towel covering his lower body, while his upper half was exposed.
His abs were hard and very defined, I never thought there was anything sexy about a six pack, but my thoughts were wrong.
I didn’t see it in person up this close before on anyone, I guess that’s why it never captured my attention or focus.
He was staring down at me coldly as he watched me checking him out so openly.
When my eyes finally decided to move away from his chest, focused on his eyes, and realized that I was boldly gaping at his body, I snapped out of my trance, blinked a few times, and turned my head away from him while chastising myself for letting him have that effect on me.
Get your head together!
You fucking hate him, that’s not gonna change just because you think he has a killer body!
As he was about to walk in front of me to go into the closet, I get up and try to speak but end up stuttering over my words like an idiot.
“Go.. Good.. Morning” I say quietly.
He stops in front of me and says firmly in his deep voice “Good morning”
I try to keep my eyes focused on his face instead of his muscles as I speak more confidently this time “I want to ask you for something”
He doesn’t respond as he keeps eyeing me levelly.
I hesitate and change my mind about opening the subject with him standing practically half naked and close to me.
I almost shudder on his behalf as he was standing there exposed in the harshly cold room without it seeming to affect him.
“uh… I.. I think it’s better if you put something on first, it’s very cold today” I say in a small voice and turn away from him embarrassingly to stop myself from continuously checking his bare chest.
I hear him going into the closet and disappearing inside.
I pace around the room waiting for him to emerge out of the closet. My bladder was about to explode but I ignore it. I was afraid he might not be willing to wait for me until I pee and leaves the room without letting me ask for anything.
I didn’t want to have that chat in front of his entire family at breakfast and I was sure he would head out of the house straight after.
So I held myself and fidgeted a little, trying to push down the urgent feeling to pee.
He gets out all dressed in black, ready to head out of the house any minute, and stands in front of me again.
Silent and waiting.
Here goes noting…
“Can I go visit my mom this morning… please?” I ask in a small voice and soften it a little at the word please.
He looks at me for a while with narrowed eyes.
I had to fight the urge to fidget as my bladder continues to nag at me.
Please say yes, please say yes.
“Is it urgent?” he finally asks coldly.
Yes, It’s so damn urgent. But I wasn’t going to emphasize that so I don’t let him suspect how extremely urgent it was.
I try another tactic “She’s all alone now, in the house. And I wanted to check on her in person. It’s the first time we part from each other, I’m worried about her”
He was studying me, considering.
I felt like he was about to refuse me or tell me that he will take me tomorrow or something, and I didn’t want him to have the chance to say that because then I’ll have no excuse to insist on today without exposing that I was up to something.
So I did the thing I was trying to avoid doing from the first day.. I begged “Please… Alex. I will do whatever you want me to do ok? just let me see her.. Please”
“Whatever I want?“ he asks.
I gulp, feeling like I trapped myself with that statement.
“If… it’s doable I mean, yeah” I said uncertainly.
“You will sleep with me from now on” he says curtly.
“What?” I blurt out while peeing my pants.. Just a little.
He closes his eyes briefly then opens them again and clarifies “I meant you will sleep next to me on the bed, on your own side. No more sleeping on the floor”
I gulp with a little relief but still ask nervously “What does it matter to you… where I sleep as along as it’s inside the room?”
“It matters. Are you going to do it?” he asks almost impatiently.
I resist the urge to ask him why and say forcibly “Fine, I’ll sleep on the bed” just for tonight, I continue in my head, then lighten my tone again as I ask “Are you going to let me visit her today?”
“Get ready, I’ll drive you there after breakfast” he says firmly.
I suppress my sigh of relief and say “Thank you”
Argh! I’m thanking the person I despise just because he allowed me the courtesy to see my own mother.
He doesn’t reply as he stalks past me towards the door.
He looks at me coldly and warns “Don’t be late” then he unlocks the door with the key he produced out of his pocket and takes it with him as he closes the door shut behind him.
I make a run to the bathroom to pee and dress up to head out after breakfast.
I was wearing a skinny blue jeans with a high neck brown wool sweater and black boots.
I give myself an insulin injection, take my purse while stuffing my phone inside it, and head out of the room hurriedly.
I check my watch as I head for the dining room, and gladly realize I was arriving to breakfast five minutes early.
We didn’t have such a precise schedule for meal time in our own house, so it was rather weird how strict Alex and his family are about that sort of thing.
They really were a family after all. Unlike us. I wasn’t used to it, that’s why I probably found it a little weird.
I enter the dining room and see that it was only me and Sara who was adding plates to the table.
She looks up and says with a smile “Good morning”
I mumble quietly “Good morning”
I wanted to ask her if she needed help but I resisted.
I didn’t want to touch anything and have Alex change his mind at the last second.
I take advantage of everyone’s absence and dig up my phone to send a message to Megan to meet me at my house in half an hour.
Just as I hit send, Alex, April, and their mother enter the kitchen together from the back door.
His mom smiles at me as she says warmly “Good morning Jennifer. I hope you were able to sleep well on your first night”
I had to really suppress the urge to scoff sarcastically.
Sleep well with her son openly declaring that he wants me dead and driving a knife just an inch above my freaking head before bed time? or her other one threatening to forcefully teach me respect and practically vowing it to my face?
I also had to resist the urge to spare a glance at Alex as I say in a small voice and try to keep any irony from seeping into it “Good morning, Mrs. Snow. I slept well thank you”
I move towards my chair as they all move to sit on theirs.
“Please, call me Diana. Mrs. Makes feel so old and elderly” she says softly to me.
I nod my head shyly.
Lucas and David enter the dining room together and say good morning to everyone.
I don’t bother to reply or look up at them as I try to busy myself with looking at my hands.
I wait specifically for Lucas to finish putting stuff on his plate, then scoop some stuff into mine, so that last night’s dinner disaster doesn’t repeat itself today.
As soon as Alex finishes his breakfast, he gets up and addresses his brother firmly “Take the car with David and meet me at the warehouse . I will take care of something first then follow you there”
He looks at me and tilts his head to the side slightly without saying anything.
If Lucas notices that I was leaving with Alex, he doesn’t say anything or comment.
I get up quickly and follow behind him out of the kitchen’s back door.
We ride in complete silence all the way to the house.
As he parks the car outside my house he speaks strictly without looking at me “How long will this visit take?”
“However long you want it to. Should I return on my own? Or should I wait for you to take me back?” I was absolutely sure of the answer before he spoke it.
“No, don’t leave the house until I come take you. I will call you when I’m on my way here, once I finish a few things” he says coldly.
I nod my head and reach for the handle before I stop to look at him.
He finally turns his head and looks at me evenly.
“Do you have my phone number?” I ask in a small voice.
He takes his phone from the dashboard, opens it, and looks at me expectantly.
I give him the number, then get out of the car without saying anything else.
He doesn’t leave until I close the door behind me.
“Mom?” I say in a loud voice.
My mom emerges from the bedroom with wide shocked eyes.
“Jenny! Oh my god you’re here?”
She runs towards me and takes me in a fierce hug.
I had to fight back a wince as her tight hug makes my cut hurt.
“How are you mom?”
I back away and give her a once over.
She had dark circles under her eyes from lack of sleep and red puffy eyes from crying all night.
My heart tugged at me at the sight of her like this.
Despite how tired she looks she smiles warmly at me and says “I’m fine, just worried about you”
I shake my head adamantly and say firmly “I don’t want you to worry about me anymore. Everything will be okay from now on, I promise”
She furrows her eyebrows and asks nervously “what does that mean?”
“I’ll tell you everything but we have to wait for Megan to arrive first”
Just then, our front door bell rings.
I hurry towards the door and open it wildly with a warm smile on my face, I missed her so much, I haven’t seen her in more than a week.
My smile instantly drops, along with my heart as I look at the actual person standing before me.
It wasn’t Megan at the door like I was expecting.
It was Simon, my cousin.